Disclaimer:
We intended to dispatch this issue pre-Christmas, but holiday festivities interfered. I use the term festivities loosely (You'll see why soon...) Alas, our pre-holiday newsletter
is post. I'd hoped to share a plethora (LOVE that word)
of tips to help readers sail through the holidays with nary a
hitch on the stress meter. Instead, you were left to fend for
yourself, which apparently you did fine, because here you are! But
as we know, stress knows no season, so whether this is pre or post
is irrelevant. I hope you had a happy, healthy,
ha-ha-holiday season!
Reay Wen yppaH!
(That's Happy New Year, recycled!)
Bobbe
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It's Beginning to Look A Lot Like Stressmas; Recycling Your Holiday Stress into Laughter!
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(Obviously written for pre-holidays. Whatever.)
It's that time of year again, Folks. That festive, cheery, exhausting holiday season.
If
you aren't feeling some level of stress by this point, please
check your pulse. Regardless of how you move through the
holidays, this time of year can be anything but miraculous.
THE PAST:
Wasn't it fun when...the
kids believed in Santa Claus? Yes, except I do like it better
when the kids realize most parents have a budget, whereas they
perceived Santa's toys were free because he and the elves made
them. That was a killer. Nonetheless, I miss the innocence of that
time. The year when we weren't sure whether our son, Nick,
believed or not, Santa brought him a bike. He took his inaugural ride
up the street and then parked the bike outside. As I tidied up
the gift wrap trash, Nick played with toys. He looked out the
window at his new bike and I overheard him say softly: "How'd he
EVER get that thing in here?" One can never assume....
THE PRESENT:
This
is the season where we get to co-exist with a million other shoppers,
whether you're shopping or not. Traffic is heavy, even in our
town with 4-way stop signs. Checkout lines are long; even
the "Express" line is long. Listed below are some examples
of my own holiday magic...
"Attention
Wal-Mart Shoppers! Bobbe has misplaced her car in the parking
lot. Again. Anyone who can help find her blue Honda
CRV, please call customer service. She's unsure of her license plate,
because she hasn't had the car that long. Her lunch hour is over
and she needs to get back to work!"
There
wasn't really a P.A. announcement, but there might as well have
been. I had to call my co-worker, Michele, who'd seen me in the
lot. Miracle of miracles, she figured out where my car was! As
you might guess, upon return to the office, most everyone knew.
Tell me I'm not the only one who loses the car. You've got to
laugh at yourself. Was this stressful? A little. Recycle It!
Christmas Party Epidemic: Our company
party was lovely with a festive atmosphere, good food, and excellent
attendance of 100+. Too excellent, as it turned out. During
the next 48 hours, attendees succumbed to a flu virus that resembled a
gastro-intestinal tsunami. The restaurant was closed by the
health department for cleaning. Back at the bank, staffing
dwindled. Four of six drive-up lanes closed temporarily (too few
tellers). Pepto-bismal became more popular than Mountain
Dew. A downward blip was detected on the shopping ticker as
employees dropped out of the shopping circuit. All of a
sudden, Christmas hopes and dreams were reduced to hoping to feel human
again. The bad news is, few of us were spared. The good news is,
many of us lost a few pre-holiday pounds, and if that isn't a Christmas
miracle, I don't know what is!
Be careful what you ask for- you might get it!
My husband goes from harvest (September to November) to
hunting (October to December) to the flu (typical onset: Christmas
Eve.) He's burned the candle at both ends for too many
months. The harvest is a "have to", the hunting is a "want
to" and the flu has become "déjà to." So this year, I
prayed that Jeff wouldn't get the flu for Christmas. He
didn't! But right on schedule, December 22nd, he fell on ice
and broke his wrist instead. It came complete with a cast,
sling, and pain meds that resembled the G.I. tsunami (see party
story above).
And the winner is...
First my flu, then his cast, and then I dreamt that a
committee wanted me to run in their Mrs. Santa Claus
pageant! I wasn't sure if this was for me, but I did have the
right hair. I'd not been in a pageant since my unsuccessful
run for Miss Merry Christmas in 9th grade. The committee promised
fab prizes for the contestants, but I'd have to make my own
costume. Could I still find red velvet this close to
Christmas? The prospect of a fabulous prize before Christmas
was too alluring. So I entered their pageant only to find out the
prizes were ferns. Yes, ferns. Dreams are funny, or are
they... (Do you think it could be stress?)
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| Bobbe's Book Bin |
If Stress is Garbage... I've Been There, Recycled That!
Economic
meltdown, post-election jitters, and GLOBAL WHINING. Just
when we need humor the most, Bobbe White creatively weaves humor and
green topics throughout her new book in time for the new year, "(If
Stress Is Garbage...) I've Bin There, Recycled That!"
Keep
in mind that White is a humorist, not an environmental
activist. White has taken a hot topic and found ways to liken
environmental issues to personal and social issues that have a negative
effect on our personal and professional lives, especially her
own. The book is not only funny, it's functional and pulls
articles from her free-online newsletter by the same title.
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Can't see the pics?
Some
email browsers block certain images and it's come to my attention
that some of you aren't getting the photos! We will be happy to
email them separately. They are a must see! Please advise! Just click here and type the subject line: Show me the photos! |
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| Quotes Recycled |
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"Laughter is the best medicine, but only because it's cheaper than an HMO."
-Buzz Nutely
"A
new study says that one of the advantages of the treadmill is that it's
the highest calorie burner of the exercises. And another advantage is
that hamsters can now laugh at us.
-Johnny Robish
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| Do Share... It's Only Fair! |
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I
received some GREAT reader comments from the Thanksgiving edition. I
love hearing about your flaws and faux pas! It's a perfect way to
recycle. Please share any holiday mishaps or just fun stories of your
holiday happenings!
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Jingle Dogs: Another
holiday activity this year was a 2-lb. pooch, named Lizzy, for
whom my kids babysat for a week. Lizzy's a sweet, white,
puffball. Her expressive eyes are human-like. So
is her diet: cottage cheese for breakfast; peas for dinner,
and 3 nibbles of vanilla ice cream before bed. I took Lizzy
for one walk. It involved wearing a quilted, belted
coat with stand-up collar. Not my coat, Lizzy's.
Walking her was surreal, because as you may know, we have a
60-lb. Labrador retriever, named Lily. Her coat is her own
fur. She swims in ice water like a fish on steroids. Walking
Lily requires a pronged collar so I can handle her. Walking
Lizzy is like walking a cotton ball on a leash.
I feared the wind might carry her away. Everything
about her is small. Even her dog bowl. It's a custard dish.
But she is the love of her Grandma Estelle's life, so good
care of her, we took. To ease Grandma's mind, we assured her
Lizzy was fine and eating like a horse. We e-mailed this picture for
fun. Giddy-up!
(Remember: email me if you can't see the picture.)
As
we begin 2009, I wish you a heart full of hope and
a recycle bin empty of
stress!
Bobbe White
Try Laughter! Inc.
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